Dear readers,

It's that time of year again. Time to drink your Shamrock Shake (Caution: May cause internal bleeding) and kiss Fit Finlay for being Irish. I thought I wrote "kiss Fit Finlay for being Trish" for a second. That would be awfully weird.

Regardless, the impending approach of St. Patback's Day also means it's time for Weekly Visitor to rank something dumb. Like "Best Guest Timekeepers" or "Best Wrestlers Who Are Named Monty Kip Sopp." This year, we'll be compiling a Best Dressed list for the sports entertainment set. Just think of Weekly Visitor as the Joan Rivers of professional wrestling websites. Yeah, that sounds about right. Super Asia suggested the topic, for which his brother will never forgive him.

"How did the voting process work?" you didn't wonder? I'm glad you didn't ask! We took the names of the 80+ Best Dressed nominees, wrote them on slips of paper, and put them in a jaunty top hat. Then someone said "Mumbo Dumbo" or whatever and we all drew names to determine our Secret Santa. I got Bill Demott! I'm going to get him a VHS copy of NWATNA's "Turning Point." The Weekly Visitor staff somehow chose the fifteen best and brightest after I passed out from eating too many pairs of wax lips.

The 15th Best Dressed Wrestler of Alllllll Time will be unveiled on March 17th, at which point he or she will shatter Steven Richards' nose. The countdown will continue every day until March 31st, or until all the wrestlers I like have broken faces. Whichever comes first. Keep in mind the fact that, at Weekly Visitor, "Best" can also mean "Worst" or "Stupidest." But if you can't tell the difference between the good stupid of The Genius and the bad stupid of Shannon Moore, then get out. Get out right now.

And hey, we've ADDED a contributor this year instead of losing like seven! Assuming everybody who voted participates! Which they probably will not!!! Like last year, banner images will be provided by Sofa. And/or Super Asia? I'm going to level with you: nobody tells me anything. And with good reason. But I know that the layout was invented by Hooker! It's like we're standing on the shoulders of giants. Sometimes we jump off to perform a Frog Splash.

So tune in next Thursday for the start of Mr. Blackwell's Best Dressed List. Mr. Steve Blackwell. He declared it to be "Party Time" before hitting me in the head with a stick.

Still can't write in cursive. I'll never be able to embroider Arn Anderson's panties.

P.S. - A Super Secret Guest Contributor has been confirmed for this year's WV-15! Who could it be? Is it SABU???

...

No!