#5 - Woody Paige (ELIMINATED)

Hometown: Memphis, I think
Finisher: Diamond Cutter
Biography: Elderly old man from ESPN's Around The Horn. Contributed a few rarely-used WVisms, such as "YOUUU GUYYYS DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU'RE TAAAALKING ABOUT!" and "bringin' the meat." Legitimate pro-wrestling fan. Likes Ric Flair. Giving homeboy a #5 seed was probably too generous. Is likely too far in the forest to see the trees against Akio.
First Opponent: Akio, Lost 0-14